My Week in a Nutshell

As we (very slowly) head toward the weekend, I thought I'd take a moment to reflect on my week and share it with you. Mostly because there's a guy that's irritating the CRAP out of me and I need to vent... but I'll get to that later. The week started off awkwardly and it looks like it's going to end annoyingly. Yay.

The Awkward: Monday. I was wearing a cowl-necked top that was not revealing unless I completely bent over. I had Fashion Taped it into place and was quite cognizant of it when leaning over - it was not at all inappropriate for work. Anyway, I was sitting at my desk, minding my own business when my coworker, Melanie, waltzed in (as she is wont to do). I turned in my chair and here's a summary of events:

Melanie: "Whoa! You need to be careful in that top!"
Me: "Oh, I know, I always hang on to it when I bend over."
Melanie: "You need to watch it when you twist, too. I just got an eyeful... not too bad. Maybe I don't mind coming in here."
Me: "Er........ ummmm...... saywhahuh?"

Very. Very. Awkward. What the heck am I supposed to say to that?!! "Thank you"?!!! Or "That's harassment - please step away from my desk"?!! I have no idea. I just completely changed the subject and asked her how her day was going without addressing the boob comment. Yowza.

And now it's Friday. Time for The Annoying. I sit next to a public printer and usually it's OK. I mean, I am antisocial so I don't necessarily enjoy people constantly streaming in and out and chatting with me but what can I do? Anyway, today I'd really like to punch someone in the head.* This one guy has been in my office TWENTY TWO times in the last hour. (Yes, I've counted.) And every single time he does he doesn't find whatever papers he's looking for so he pokes every button on the printer multiple times, checks the paper tray multiple time and checks the ink cartridges multiple times. He does this every single time without exception. Now, I know the printer works. Everyone else, myself included, has been printing stuff all day - even in and around Dumbass McButtonPusher's "print jobs" - with no problem. I desperately want to shout at the guy "IT'S NOT THE PRINTER! IT'S YOU!!!!!!!!!!" but as yet I have not. Deep breath. If I injure someone at work, I will only have to stay here longer... ;o)

* My favorite, favorite line from The 40-Year-Old Virgin is "Then you punch her in the f&ckin' head!" (Just for your reference: Cal says this to Andy after Andy asks Cal what he should do if Trish laughs at him when he tells her he's a virgin.) Anyway, I've discovered a group on Facebook called 'I Secretly Want To Punch Slow Walking People In The Back Of The Head' - and I've seriously considered joining. I am not a bad person! I'm just really, really, really easily irritated.