All I Want for Christmas Is to Not Be Sick

First post of December and this is it: I. Am. Sick. I have one week left of instruction before finals and my head feels like it's about 60 pounds and wants to roll right off my body with my next coughing fit. Why oh WHY must I be The Germ? And today's the only day I had to decorate my house for Christmas before becoming buried under studying, too. Mew.

I Need a New Nose. Please.

I know I haven't updated the blog in a bit but I am so sick right now I don't even have the strength to write anything witty. I went to the doctor on my first day of vacation (December 21st) to get a good jump on my illness. Things seemed to be improving on their own but I thought it couldn't hurt to get a professional assessment. So, off to the doctor I went and she diagnosed me with bronchitis and sent me off with a prescription for Zithromax. Now, I should've stopped her right there because, if you recall from last year's sinus kerfuffle, Zithromax doesn't cut it for me. But, I was stupid and thought "Oh, it's not a sinus infection - maybe Zithromax will work since I'm practically over my sickness, anyway." Stupid me!!!!

Cut to Tuesday, December 29th. Things are worse than EVER and my nose, eyes, ears and lungs are full of things you people don't want to know about. So, I called my doctor again and she prescribed Augmentin. Just like last year. Too bad I'm already well within the throes of a vicious sinus infection and my earlier visit amounted to squat!!!!!! I got no jump on anything!!! I. Am. Miserable. I haven't gotten to really enjoy being away from work and now I have to go back in three days. To say this sucks would be an understatement.

Since this all started in 2009, I can't really blame 2010. But lemme tell you, this year isn't impressing me much, either. Because I am sick Robert and I poo-poo'ed our NYE tradition of going to the movies and stayed in with Biji to play video games and watch something on Pay Per View. Too bad my f*&^%ng TiVo blew up not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES during the course of my purchase so not only didn't I get to see a movie but I basically threw $4.99 down the toilet. Sweet! If this is an omen of things to come, I'm going to bed for the next year.



(And I think, for the first time in history, I'm taking my tree down before my birthday. I am that unhappy, people. I'm willingly killing Christmas!!)

An Open Letter to Future Lauren

Dear 2010 Lauren,

I know you love Christmas. Trust me -- I do, too. And I know you think having a real tree is a part of the Christmas magic. But let me tell you, since you will be all aglow with the festivity of the season and not thinking clearly and I am sucking down black cherry cough drops like they're going out of style, it's not really worth it. It's not! Yeah, the tree smells nice but can you really smell it through a nose that's completely plugged? No. And hot cocoa is delicious and Christmas-y... but can you drink such a dairy-riffic beverage with severe chest congestion? No! Christmas carols don't sound quite so jolly when heard through fluid-filled ears, do they?! Didn't think so. And you know that delightful stuffed-up nose whistle you've developed? The one that was kind of cute when you were at home and the dog thought you were whistling to him so he'd follow you all over the house all night? It wasn't so cute when you were trying to talk to students on the phone at work. So please, please, please hear me when I tell you that you should reeeeally put some serious thought into buying a phony tree. Just try it for one year. You might find that a Christmas free from phlegm, raw nostrils and a sore throat is worth not having a Charlie Brown tree. You'll never know unless you try. Please.

Hoping the words really sink in,

Sick, sad and deflated 2009 Lauren

A Different Kind of Christmas

This time of year, I am usually unabashedly giddy with excitement. Trees, lights, hot cocoa, cider, songs... all fabulous, uplifting things! This year, however, is a little... droopy. I sort of feel like Charlie Brown's Christmas tree. I just can't seem to pump myself up nearly as much as I usually do. I put out the decorations. I'm wearing my sequined Santa shirt and my reindeer earrings but I don't know. I just can't get to 10 on the Scale o' Christmas Joy. :o( Is it the economy? That's probably part of it; it's hard to get excited about anything when you're constantly scrutinizing all aspects of your budget. But that's not the only Grinch around. There just seems to be a general mood of 'meh' in the air. This is supposed to be the best time of the year!!! If this is crappy, I hold no hope for much of 2010. Boo.

And on that cheery note, let me tell you about our tree decorating! We got our tree and put it up last weekend but Robert wasn't able to get the lights up until Friday so I wasn't able to decorate it until Saturday. Normally this would've caused me to flail around on the floor, kicking and screaming about how Christmas is ruined because I got a week less of tree. This year, not so much. (I didn't say none, Robert, so shut up. I said not so much.)

I am allergic to pine trees, however, so the annual decorating of the tree always poses a problem. Why do I not get a fake tree, you ask? Why do I insist on punishing myself with sinus issues for weeks on end? Well, because my parents had a fake tree for many, many years for this very reason (my mom is allergic, too) but I always, always, always developed a sinus infection between Christmas and my birthday every single stinking year anyway. So, really, why go without the very essence of Christmas when I'm going to wind up with the same end result? I won't. Christmas isn't Christmas without going out and picking out the most smushed up and deformed tree on the lot!

Unfortunately for me, however, I did not do anything to help myself while Robert was rustling the tree around sending needles a-flying while putting on the lights. So, of course, I developed a runny nose and sore throat by the time I went to bed Friday night. Things had not improved by Saturday. Nor have they improved by today. But I digress. Because I was already developing some degree of sinus hell, I decided to decorate the tree wearing one of Robert's face masks.

Because nothing says Christmas like feeling like you're suffocating in your own carbon dioxide.

I suppose it helped because I'm not substantially worse than I was on Saturday. I'm just not any better, either, so I'm still bitter. Moving on.

Remember our gigantenormous tree stand from years past? Gone, baby! I finally (under the pretense of it being in the dog's best interest) got Robert to break down and spring for the Omega tree stand. This thing is AWESOME. Awesome!!! It took us less than 60 seconds to get the tree in the stand and get it straight. 60 seconds!!! Unheard of with our other stand. But that isn't even the best part. The best part is this tree stand isn't 3 feet wide! No more bed sheet to cover up the unsightly stand legs, resulting in stubbed toes. We are rollin' in style this year, people! Check it out:



And here are our new ornaments for this year:





This year also marked the first year Robert's spirit broke enough to buy a Douglas fir. If you know Robert, you know how much he looooooves Noble firs and how much he hates the Douglas' puny little non-light-supporting branches. But because any Douglas on the lot was going for $25, that's what we bought. It was a little hard to hang ornaments on the less-than-sturdy branches but I managed.



And Garfunkel was such a trooper! He and I were alone decorating the tree and he didn't so much as try to nibble a single ornament or the garland. He sniffed a couple but then left everything alone. The tree hasn't bothered him a bit since it's been up - nor has he bothered it. He's a fabulous puppy!!

He is not, however, a fabulous model. I bought him a $10 pair of antlers and all I wanted was ONE measly photo. Not for him to wear them for a day or an hour. Just for one photo. Well, I got more than one photo... Just not any good photos. I should've been more specific.




Robert is trying to coax a pose with a sweet potato treat but Garfunkel's not going for it.




Sigh. Oh well. This session was a bust. But I WILL get my photo, Garfunkel. Oh yes. It will be mine.

Germ Depression

Ugh. I hate this time of year!!! Just when my post-Christmas depression starts to wear thin my "I have no more time accrued" depression sets in. I just completed my time sheet for this month and - woohoo!! - I have a whopping 2.34 hours of vacation leave at the end of this month. No sick time. No nothing. Just 2.34 hours of vacation on which to build enough time to take a honeymoon. Needless to say, that is not going to happen. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaugh!!! There are a lot of days without pay in my future... yay.

And, to top it all off, my whole sinus situation has taken a turn for the worse. I just had a dialog with my doctor and she said to me (and this is a direct quote), "You know sometimes Zithromax doesn't work for sinuses--lets switch you to augmentin...sorry about that." GREAT!!! So I get to start a new round of antibiotics tomorrow. God was listening after all. Sweet!

The Germ Really IS Back!

Well, I've just returned from my doctor's office and - surprise, surprise - I have a full-blown sinus infection. In fact, when my doctor first walked in the exam room she said "So, you got your January sinus infection in February this year, huh?" Which made me laugh. :o) I picked up my antibiotics on the way home, so I should be feeling better soon.

I am, however, off work today but I am definitely, for sure going back tomorrow. This is precisely how I wound up in the hole on sick time last year - it was all eaten up (and then some) by the end of January because of my stupid sickness!!! It will not happen again, damn it!! Besides... my upstairs neighbor is always home, which makes staying home sick less than restful. When you can hear someone's butt squeak as they slide around in the bathtub, you just can't relax completely, you know what I mean?

The Germ... is Back.

I am home sick today, because I am a wuss. Robert has been sick since the end of last week and he hasn't stayed home one day. (He won't take a sick day for a myriad of reasons, one of which is he hasn't taken a sick day since October 2002. That's right. The man has not called in sick in SIX-AND-A-HALF YEARS.) Biji, with whom I visited last week, is home sick today with bronchitis for which he is taking antibiotics. At least three people in my office have been out since Friday with some sort of bug. Who infected me? Hard to say. Does it matter? Not so much. :o( I'm still probably going to blame Biji, though.

The Germ is Felled Again

I don't think I've worked a full week thus far this month. Let's recap, shall we?

1.) The first week of January was a short week through no fault of my own - it was due to the New Year's holiday. Score!

2.) The following week I was out sick with a bug of some sort that nearly ruined my birthday festivities.

3.) The week of the 14th was shortened by a day-and-a-half due to a Thursday afternoon wedding. (I had requested Friday off, as well, because originally Robert and I thought we'd take the day to sleep in, since we weren't sure how late the wedding would run. Then Robert was "responsible" and went to work. Pbth!). Luckily, that time came out of my vacation pot. Woohoo!

4.) Last week was a short one for two reasons: (a) the MLK holiday; and (b) I started feeling sick on Wednesday night, resulting in a short day on Thursday and a sick day on Friday.

5.) Turns out, I have a sinus issue which has resulted in bronchitis and fluid in my ears. As such, I was out Monday and Tuesday of this week.

Now that I have used up all my sick time, (and then some), I am back at work. Happy happy, joy joy. I am on antibiotics now, though, so I should feel better very soon. I hope.

I just want to take a nap! Mew. :o(

4th Strike

This week sucks. I have been sick all week - my birthday week!! Actually, I received a small reprieve on Tuesday so that was fortunate. I did feel well enough to go to work that day and go out for my annual family birthday dinner. But, Monday - sick. Wednesday - really sick. Thursday - better, but still sick. I'm at work today and feeling better, thank goodness, but I'm almost always sick to some degree on my birthday. It's just a bad time of year for me, I guess; plus, I seem to get sick if you look at me sideways! Back when I used to work at the law firm, one of the secretaries called me "The Germ." (1) Because I was very often sick, (either with a minor cold, the flu (twice) or conjunctivitis (once)), during my 4-year tenure; and (2) if anyone in the office was sick, I'd invariably catch it. I really was, (and still am, apparently), a giant germ, I guess.

The point of my sick rambling, you may ask? Well, Robert told me Tuesday night that, while he would like to have planned something for this coming weekend to celebrate my birthday, schedules being what they are meant that we would be celebrating next weekend instead. I was bummed but glad he told me in advance ... if I'd been thinking all week long, (as I undoubtedly would), that I was going to have some fantastical party only to come up with bupkus, I would indeed have been a wee bit miffed. Just a wee bit. :o) Fast forward to Wednesday night, when I was miserable and feeling generally rotten, and I said to Robert "I am so glad we're not doing anything for my birthday this weekend - I feel awful!" His response? Giant, unblinking saucer-eyes and a look that clearly stated I'd ruined a 4th surprise. SCORE! I don't know what's planned but I do wish I would quit ruining things for myself!!!!! I suck! Mew.

My birthday Oreo cheesecake

The only good thing about this week is that I did feel better on Tuesday and was able to celebrate my big day to its fullest, complete with birthday singing and lots of presents. Actually, maybe I was unwell ... I never let restaurant people sing Happy Birthday!! It did make me feel more birthday-ish, though, so it wasn't a bad thing after all.

Me, Robert, Wade, Melanie & my parents