Cars and Coco

Okay, so, as I predicted, I'm totally waffling on my "big life decision" so I don't have any news on that front. But! I do have a few less important updates to apprise you of so here we go:

(1) I got my stupid stinky, leaky car fixed two weekends ago and it turned out that a clogged sunroof drain was the culprit. I didn't even realize my sunroof had a drain; in fact, it has two! The clogged one caused both the leak in the ceiling and the one in the floor and it only took 3 days and $450 to fix it. Happy happy, joy joy! Here's my excited face. :-| Stupid expired warranty. Stupid money sieve Saturn. I hate you both!!!

(2) Robert and I saw Conan at the Nob Hill Masonic Center on Friday night and I took a few cell phone photos from our last row seats (we were just left of center, though, so it really wasn't so bad).

The promo screens before the show

Conan asking if we like his beard (I totally do - he looks so much better! And less red in person...)

Musical guest Chris Isaak

The inflatable "bat from hell"

The show was good. Not GREAT! but definitely good. There was less stand-up Conan than I thought there'd be - he sang a lot of songs. Humorous songs but still... it was hard to understand him over all the music so I didn't really enjoy them as much as the straight comedy. Robert was suuuuuuuuper excited that Andy Richter was there... until he discovered that he wasn't so funny on this tour. The scripted banter was kind of stilted. There were a few SF-specific bits that were pretty good. Two "commercials" for local merchants (Glass Dildo Me and the Bushman at Fisherman's Wharf) and a very funny Triumph the Insult Comic Dog bit. Conan has been featuring local musical guests on the tour (Spoon in Eugene and Eddie Vedder in Seattle) so Robert was crushed to learn that Chris Isaak was the designated local go-to for SF. He is about one click short of straight-out abhorring the man and I don't really know why. I like Chris Isaak - I don't lurv him but I like him - so I was fine with the selection. Robert was pulling for Neil Young; I can't even begin to express my happiness that Neil was not there. (Apparently, Neil was there for the first show in SF (as a regular ol' non-musical guest) so we might've just made a narrow escape!) The parking garage under the Masonic Center cost THIRTY DOLLARS to park in which just about gave Robert a heart attack and a stroke at the same time. Even I was shocked and taken aback. I mean, I expect parking in the city to be ridiculously expensive but somehow I was not prepared for $30. We were feeling a little better about our choice, though, when we were able to vacate the garage in less than 10 minutes and saw the line to pay for the cheaper garage a half-block away stretching all the way around the corner. All in all a successful evening and not a bad way to spend a Friday night.

This Smells Like the Balls It Sucks

This is a photo of the aforementioned uber-moist floor mat that I took with my cell phone. I noticed when I got into my car after work today that the soggy item is causing a funk to arise in my car, due, no doubt, to its 9-hour fermentation in The Bay's parking lot. I should really buy stock in scented candles and car fresheners.

And You Wonder Why They Quit Making These...

There was a month back when I was in college (I believe it was October of 2000) when my car was broken into for the 2nd time and I was rear-ended by a guy with no insurance. This isn't quite as bad as that but there's clearly something about me that causes similar catastrophes to befall me within a 30-day window. Case in point: Monday I discovered that I have a leak in the roof of my car and on Tuesday I realized I also have a leak in the floor of my car, right under the driver's side floor mat. Fan-freaking-tastic. Oh, and did I mention the warranty on my car expired in January? Yippee skippy! My old Saturn SL2 was a trooper; it died a somewhat early death of multi-system failure at 90,000 miles but up until then it chugged along with barely a blip. I loved it so very much that I bought the next generation after it died suddenly and I was forced to buy a new car. Ugh. My new stupid Saturn ION is barely 3 years old and it already has several windshield chips (the old one received none through 8 years and dozens of treks up and down I5), a mysterious rattle near the trunk that has been "fixed" 3 times but still lives and a wonky set-up in the front console that causes my radio display to flicker intermittently when I use my windshield wipers (this has also been "fixed"). Now it has not one but two leaks?! Ridiculous!!! I guess I need to start brushing up on my water skiing skills because it appears as though I'm a magnet for flooding...

Lumpy

Last night, I made the mistake of divulging my parking spot's name to Robert. He laughed and laughed and thought it was SO cute. Gah. But since he wanted me to take a picture of Lumpy and blog about it, I guess I will. Hmph.

We were chatting on the way back from dinner and I mentioned that yesterday was the first day I'd been back at work since Daylight Savings. And that I'd only realized that when I was hotter than usual during lunch. Why, you ask? Well, because I eat lunch in my car. Yes, I'm dorky and antisocial and I like it! I used to eat out almost every day when I worked at the law firm but have since discovered that: (1) it's a lot cheaper to brown bag it (not that I didn't realize that before but I don't think I really cared); and (2) I relish getting away from work and work people during my lunch hour. Sure, it's antisocial and yes, I do eat lunch with other people at least once a week so I'm not a complete hermit. But eating in my car is relaxing; it's comfortable, I can listen to music and read my book and just, well, relax. I used to eat outside at one of the many picnic tables available but those come with bugs. Ants. Bees. Bleh. My car? Just for me! And that's the way I like it.

I have scoped out some premium lunching spots during my year here at the Bay - spots that are far enough away from the building that people won't walk by and gawk at me, spots that have ample shade, spots that face trees or walls and not other cars (too much glare - yuck). But there is one spot in particular that I've become fond of and that's Lumpy. Lumpy is a good spot in the late fall, winter and early spring months because he starts out sunny but is completely shady by lunch time. So, my car absorbs any available warmth during the day but doesn't fry me while I eat. (Lumpy is too hot for summer; I prefer a completely shaded spot during summer and no, that spot doesn't have a name). Lumpy is called Lumpy because, well, it's lumpy. I have done extensive research into my selection of parking spots suitable for lunching and have had to make mental notes as to unique identifiers of each spot. If I'm even one spot off, I'm in trouble. Lumpy is one of three spots in front of a particular tree but is the only spot with mossy potholes. So, to remember the spot, I named him Lumpy. And every morning when I pull into my spot I say "Good morning, Lumpy!" I am a dork - we've covered this already!

Lumpy is a great spot because not only is it the perfect ratio of sun to shade, because it's hole-y, no one really wants to park there. So, Lumpy is almost always waiting for me and it makes me happy to see him empty in the morning. (The parking lot is empty this week because of Spring Break - otherwise, the spaces next to my car would be occupied). Anyway, yesterday I was oddly hot during lunch and there was an unusual amount of sun pouring into my car while I ate. I took my lunch at the same time as I usually did - what was up? Well, thanks to DST, what is now 2:00 used to be 1:00 and, as such, my usual patch of lunch shade had yet to arrive. Dang! Now I either have to take my lunch a lot later (which I don't really want to do because I don't want to gnaw my own hand off while biding my time until lunch) or I have to abandon Lumpy and park in the spot to the right of Lumpy. (Robert wants me to name that spot, too, but no! Lumpy is Lumpy and that's it). :o( Pretty soon I'll have to desert Lumpy altogether because it'll be too hot but I was not expecting to have to say goodbye so soon. Mew. I only hope his next patron enjoys his amenities as much as I do...

The view from Lumpy...